U guys have to understand that we live in a wonderful right. Don’t think about the pain and the problems that u are up too, when u are reading this article. I want u to stay focus, thinking about what a good life u have right now. Be grateful my friend.
Many people operate in the world with little or no understanding of themselves. This lack of understanding may apply to several different aspects of life. These include:
• awareness of your beliefs
• awareness of your capabilities
• awareness of your skills and knowledge
• awareness of your thoughts and emotions.
One of the difficulties is that we are not aware of the things we are not aware of! We often have blind spots in those areas where we can make the most significant improvement.
The Blind Spots Factor
I read a book from Paul Morgan about “Managing Yourself” and at that time, I got thoughts in ma head keep thinking about the blind spots mean.
When we understand these beliefs we can then appreciate how they influence the results we get in life. We can be aware of how they impact upon our day-to-day lives. However, there are many times that we have blind spots. We are unaware of beliefs, thoughts and feelings that reduce the quality of our lives. We are highly adept at seeing other people’s blind spots but are very poor at recognizing our own blind spots.
Levels of emotional awareness
One of the leading researchers in emotional intelligence is Dr John Mayer. He has identified three broad levels of emotional self-awareness – self-aware, engulfed and accepting. As you read through their descriptions, decide on which are best applied to you.
Self-aware
Some people have a sophisticated awareness and understanding of their emotional lives. They are very clear on feelings, moods and emotions. This provides a solid foundation for managing emotions.
Engulfed
Some people are swamped and pulled around on a sea of emotions. These people are helpless and their behaviour is driven by their moods. There is a strong sense of being overwhelmed.
Accepting
Some people are able to identify their emotions. They are resigned to those emotions. When the emotion is positive the person is happy.
However, when the emotions are negative they are not so good. There is a sense that emotions simply happen and the person responds accordingly.
These varying levels of self-awareness are not abstract concepts. They describe the ways people live. The scenarios below show the practical ways varying levels of self-awareness influence our day-to-day lives.
How do you feel?
A useful activity when developing self-awareness is to start to define your own emotions. You can define them in a way that is meaningful to you. Once you have done this, you can precisely define the physical experience you have when in a particular emotional state. For example, when you are in a state of fear think about what you feel. Do you have a sensation in the body? Where is it? What shape is it? What is its intensity? How long does it go on for? What is your breathing like?
By asking these and other questions you are able to become increasingly aware of your emotional states. As you work through this process you can also combine it with keeping a record of your thought patterns. When you experience a particular emotion, what do you say to yourself? One thing or many things? Do certain thoughts go around in your head repeating themselves?
As you undertake this rigorous process you will be able to explore the way your thoughts and emotions are linked. You will also be able to identify things that trigger your responses.
As time goes by
A further way of enhancing your self-awareness is to become mindful of the ways you use your time. Often people drift through days – even lives! They are conscious of doing certain things while many other activities are done on autopilot. By systematically keeping a time log you are able to see where your time goes. If this is done over several weeks you can see where your time is going. You can then decide whether it is the way you want to live. It is possible to identify the things on which you procrastinate and where your time is wasted. If you are not living the life you want to live, it is up to you to make changes.
So What Do We Need?
Change is the only answers to this question, changes are good to live in the life u have by your way.
Denial
The first response to imposed changes, or the need for change, is often denial. Here it is difficult to accept that change is required. At times the person goes on behaving in the old way. So the
bereaved wife continues to iron her husband’s clothes or the redundant worker still gets up and gets ready for work. There is a tendency to focus on the past. This is how it always was. This is where it feels comfortable. Here people can also be numbed and apathetic.
Resistance
As denial fades there is a realization that the old ways of being and behaving may no longer be tenable. At this stage the numbness gives way to more observable emotional responses. The person may experience emotions such as rage, anger, anxiety, panic, sadness and depression. When someone loses their job they may be very resentful and agitated. Conversely, they could be despondent and resigned to a ‘sense of failure’. Other symptoms include disturbed sleep and a sense of impotence. Here people know the old ways have gone, yet resist letting go of them.
Exploration
In the third stage there is an elevation in the levels of energy. People switch their attention from the past and present towards the future. At times the energy is channelled into many directions and ‘projects’. Here the person is trying to capture some control over their lives and their destiny. There may be a tendency towards dense, overelaborate solutions. There may be difficulty in concentrating on a single approach. The lack of progress may be frustrating. However, the mood of the person is elevated and they become more proactive. A typical example will be a redundant person who starts applying for a variety of jobs, explores self-employment and checks out retraining all at the same time.
Commitment
The final stage of the transition process is commitment. The person has now found new patterns of behaviour and has energy to channel into them. At this stage there are subtle refinements. There is a clear sense of direction. There is also a sense of making real progress.
